It came to me on a particularly rough day that living with chronic M is like living in tornado alley---all the time. Much like individuals who live in a community where they must constantly prepare for the next impending tornado, I have to do the same. There are particular warning signs that my body experiences which alert me to what is soon about to happen. At first, I outright deny that it is going to really happen---AGAIN? NOOOO!! Not again! Then, I have to settle down and focus on the inevitable reality. The tornado is definitely headed my way. Gulp.
I take shelter. I stop what I am doing and depending on where I am, I get home as quickly as possible. I grab my migraine tool kit which is full of necessary supplies and head to my bunker. My family room or bedroom is cool and dark and has the environment I need to survive the storm. Sometimes I am alone, and other times, loved ones are right beside me. Each tornado comes with a vengeance and leaves a nasty path of utter destruction which is highly unpredictable each and every time. Scary.
But when the storm is over and all starts quieting down just a bit, I learned I have two choices to make. I can either stay down in my bunker taking shelter for fear of when the next tornado arrives, or I can open up the bunker door and step out into the light of a brand new day. Let me be honest here, there are plenty of times I just want to stay and take shelter. I am exhausted and weary physically and emotionally and wonder if it is worth going out. That attitude is not a healthy one. That attitude won't put my feet on the ground to start moving forward again. That attitude won't help me clean up all the strewn debris. That attitude allows for a victim mentality which is simply not who I am in Christ.
Instead, I try to intentionally choose to open the the bunker door, step outside into the glorious Light, and get back to living the rich life I have been given. God provides every grace necessary to carry on while living in my tornado alley. I may fail in my attitude at times, but God never fails in His love and care for me. Never.
Friends, in what circumstances do you find yourself learning some of life's tough lessons? Where do you find answers? Is it easy or hard to change your attitude when it needs an overlhaul?
I will let you sit and wrestle with those questions for awhile.