"Nobody escapes being wounded. We are all wounded
people. The main question is not how can we hide our
wounds, but how can we put our woundedness in service
of others? When our wounds cease to be a source of shame,
and become a source of healing, we become wounded
healers." H. Nouwen
Personally, my heart has experienced a fair amount of sadness, confusion, and loss these past several months. My mind has been triggered into various degrees of "unsettledness" largely due to all the constant drama of the horrific pandemic and the even more horrific political arena. Nonstop news noise screaming at me from many different directions has brought me to my knees seeking respite from my weariness. Fervent continued prayer doesn't even seem enough.
In addition to the obvious challenges of how our lives have changed, my heart has suffered loss of long time dear friends which pierces the core of my being. Also, my heart is aching for a friend who just loss her young son in an accident. Loss on top of loss this year does not seem to be slowing down one bit. Making space for my grieving is necessary, and I am slowly and intentionally doing so. The most healing my soul has experienced was attending an All Soul's church service where I could remember and honor my loved ones who have now gone before me while lighting a candle and saying goodbye.
Not physically connecting with our loved ones in the manner of which we are accustomed feels "not right" on so many levels. It is one thing to deal with that most uncomfortable situation for a few weeks or maybe a few months, but this virus is not diminishing, and our exhaustion from it continues. I wonder how much longer we will have to travel this winding road with its many rocky pebbles and stones even after the vaccine gets distributed to people?
I would venture to guess that most of us are carrying deep sorrow and woundedness which have possibly been wreaking havoc on our body, mind, and spirit since the beginning of 2020. Our struggling is real and difficult to even put into words at times. Validating our feelings on a day to day basis is super important in order to cope when everything feels like a heavy burden. Since we are all navigating the tumultuous seas but doing so in different boats, it would be good to learn to help one another as best we can. On a positive note, I believe this year has taught us new ways of coping while realizing we are much stronger than we ever believed possible.
Helping one another is what H. Nouwen meant when he said we can "put our woundedness in service to others." Now more than ever, this should be practiced. Join hands across the internet and give big air hugs with supportive texts and emails that encourage one another to keep the faith. Admit that life is really hard and confusing, but realize we are not alone in our suffering. We are in good company for sure.
My special woundedness that has been with me for years now is chronic migraine. I know for me once I stopped being fearful, anxious, or ashamed of it, I learned how to become a wounded healer by listening and trying to help those who need guidance, courage, and direction with this debilitating disease. Letting others know they do not have to travel their journey alone offers solace and hope. God has clearly laid this path before me for which I am grateful and humbled.
The holidays are upon us and, boy, will they look and feel very foreign to us. How might you reach out in your woundedness to help someone else feel encouraged and loved? How can your creativity spread love and laughter to those in need? How might the practice of your faith lead others to do the same?
May you all have a Thanksgiving filled with gratitude, joy, and love as you count your blessings even in this incredibly challenging year of 2020.
This is my wish for you, my friends.
